So It Begins

Now it's November and the enormity of 50,000 words before December has hit home.  That's a lot of damn words.  But I suppose I got off to a good start.  I haven't done my writing for the day, but last night (after midnight, so I'm counting it, kids) I wrote about seven half pages worth of a scene further down the line.  I'll probably rewrite it when I get to it again (I'm going to attempt to stay in order), but the idea wouldn't leave me alone, so I had to write it last night.  That's how it has to be done lest I forget everything.

I haven't counted the words.  I'll save that for when I type it later.  I always handwrite first, then type and edit the first draft at the same time.  It's easier to concentrate with a pen in hand and it's easier to be brutal to your writing when you're typing and have all the powers of cut and paste at your fingertips.

I suspect the cigar bar will see a great deal of me this month since my brand new desk top will be away having its integrated video card replaced (this has caused much pulling of hair and gnashing of teeth, but I'm over it now - kind of).  I love to write in public places simply because it gives you enough distraction to keep yourself sane, but not so much that you can't plug in your headphones and ignore the mess around you.  Plus the mess can sometimes serve as excellent inspiration.  Lots of brainwaves flying around helps too, I think. 

50,000 words, I shall write you and make you my bitch.  That's a promise.

Nanowrimo

I attempted nanowrimo last year and failed miserably, clocking in barely 2000 words.  Somewhere around the second week, I decided that I'm not meant to write 50,000 words in a month because I'm deliberate (I refuse to concede that I'm slow).  But that excuse seems rather pale, so I figured I might as well give it another shot.

This year, instead of forcing myself to work on the novel I feel like I should work on, I'm working on the one I want to work on.  The one I keep getting ideas for even though it's kind of more of a silly/fun thing.  And I'll be more prepared this time.  I have one big Circa notebook dedicated to this.  I put notes, worksheets, and existing parts in the notebook along with plenty of clean paper.  At the moment, I'm reading over the parts I've written and making notes on them.  Next, I'll be supplying myself with a few visual aids to help out.  The main things will be floor plans for all of the important rooms and homes, etc.  For some reason with this one, I'm having a really hard time visualizing the settings.  Hopefully this will help.

Right now everything is looking like this:

and this:

In any case, kids, Happy Nano.

For once I'm going to attempt to document this process just because... well... I'm not sure why.  Just seems like the thing to do.

Lately

This has been an odd month.  In some ways it's been lovely and in others it's just been hectic. 

At the beginning of the month, I found myself restless and going out practically every night.  During that process, I did make a wonderful new friend although I'm afraid he seeks something more than friendship.  I hate having that talk with male friends.  The whole trite "I like you, but not in that way" thing sounds so ridiculous and childish, but I've yet to come up with anything better.  I also hate that men and women are so overwhelmed by our hormones these days that we can barely be friends.  Something more is always expected, then when one party doesn't want anything more, the second party gets pissed off or their feelings are hurt and you're no longer friends.  I hate that.  I get along with men much better than women, but I don't want to sleep with all of my male friends, so they get bored once they realize it ain't happening and then I lose yet another good friend.  Anyway, I'm hoping he'll understand and maybe we won't have to have the talk, but I ain't holding my breath.

A couple weeks ago, I went to Chattanooga to walk around, take pictures, and do a little research for one of my novels.  That was wonderful.  I love Chattanooga and if I ever manage to get enough stuff paid off and if I can get over my fear of uprooting, I want to move there.  I got a lot of great pictures and good ideas and clearer visions of the novel in question.  I plan to go back soon to get a little more done.  I went with my new friend mentioned above, and while wonderful fun, I didn't get as much work done as I'd like to have.  I think I'll stay overnight next time too.  I also plan to borrow my parents' new house (that they have furnished but haven't moved into yet) in the mountains (Northeast Georgia) to stay and do some research for another novel.  Really looking forward to that too.

Last week, I found myself getting incredibly annoyed with work.  Nothing major happened and I didn't get overstressed or anything.  I just lost my patience with every aspect of my job.  Because I know this isn't where I belong, and I know this isn't the best use of my time.  But I do have to pay my bills and the only way to do that is to keep slaving away like the drone I've become.  I can usually deal with it pretty well as long as I have other things to amuse me during my free time and as long as I can continue to write and live, but I have my moments when I just resent the day Man came up with the brilliant idea of currency.  I'm sure that innocent little cave-dweller had no idea it would one day rule the lives of his descendants. 

The past couple weeks, I've discovered a need to chill and to have some time to myself - enough to maybe get some things done.  But all through this, there have been invitations to hang out, good visits with Dodd, bad visits with Dodd, arguments with Dodd, and peals of laughter with Dodd.  Has left me little time to relax. 

Really needing a day off from everything and everybody except the pen and my characters.  I keep getting this feeling like the only way I will ever find any sense of contentment with my career/life is to finish and publish a novel.  I HAVE TO FINISH SOMETHING SOON!  That becomes a more and more prominent thought with every day that passes.  The problem is finding the time and balance of time to do it.  Being more a "marathon" person, I have a difficult time stealing 15 minutes or even an hour a day for writing.  I need at least three hours if I really want to accomplish something.  Granted, that could be my problem.  But no matter what I try or what method I try to figure out, my writing suffers from cursory sessions.  So what's a girl to do? 

ESCAPE could be my only recourse.  Mountains, I'll see you soon.