When Passive Ought to be More Agressive

I'm an expert of passive-agressive behavior. I'm more guilty of it than most people. In most situations my thinking is, "Well, I know I can take this thing that's bothering me, but I'm not sure if they can take me telling them I'm bothered. Well, I'd rather deal with this than cause a stink."

But the monarch of passive-agressive behavior is my darling dearest. I'm downright assertive compared to him. Whereas I come to a breaking point fairly quickly when something that has bothered me continues to happen, either he has no breaking point or when it comes, it'll be REEEEAAAALLLY messy.

I've talked to him about this a couple times, but I don't know if he's still being passive-agressive and becoming resentful without me knowing or if he's more tolerant because it's me or if he's getting over things that quickly. Whatever it is, I know he's been annoyed without telling me what was wrong. I've begged him to tell me anytime something I've done or that I have a habit of doing starts to get on his nerves. But he usually just asks me not to nag so much and that's it. I know there's more I do that bothers him. And it's bothering me even more that he won't tell me.

Yes, I can be a nag. Yes, I have asked him not to do some things that bother me, but my thinking is that if we don't get some of these things figured out and settled upon now, it's going to be that much harder to break some of these habits down the road when we may be sharing a living space. He needs to know that I'm NOT always going to be the one to do the dishes and I need to know that I'm NOT going to do this or that thing that may bother him. Maybe he hasn't had the benefit of being so INCREDIBLY run over like have. I know he's been taken advantage of A LOT, but so have I. I've lived in fear of asserting myself in the past and I've learned from it. You DO NOT allow yourself to be run over.

Neither of us should have to put up with it anymore - even from each other.

Days Off are Cool

I'm just blogging right now for the sheer novelty of being able to blog from home.

Yes, at last I have the internet at home. It only took me three years and the threat of office railroading and the fear of being unemployed lest I find a nice cozy MT job. And that sentence is proof that I am very sleepy.

Also had to show off my hair. I finally found a color that actually looks red on my ever-darkening coif.

I dig it even though I look like ass in this picture.




















Happy home internetting. :^)

I'm Trying Very Hard not to Freak Out

I'm in a bit of a tizzy lately. I just took my final for my MT certification, and my employers knew I was almost finished. They know I'm leaving as soon as I find a job. It's also in the middle of summer and I work for an AC/HVAC company. Filling in the blanks yet?

Long story short, the company I work for is already looking for my replacement. Which makes me really afraid that I'm going to be booted out of here as soon as we get somebody trained. So now I'm freaking out. I HAVE to find a job SOON. And I have to look and apply to most of these positions online, so I have to get internet at home now. I'm just so worried I'm going to get this internet service, have all these bills and debts to pay, and then lose my job before I can find a new one.

Someone please reassure me or give me a transcription job.

>:^p

I've been a very bad blogger. But not without reason. Lately, I've not had enough interesting things going on and too many mundane things going on to do much of anything besides go to dreadful work and go to class and/or work on assignments for class.

But, I'll be done with my MT certification next Tuesday and I'm taking the rest of the week off from after-work activities. Of course, I'll probably still be surfing the web for jobs and hopefully applying electronically. Seriously folks, I can't get out of my current job fast enough. It's driving me apeshit.

Maybe I'll have an epiphany here soon which will give me something to write about. Until then, back to doing my classwork at my job. I'd feel bad about this, but I have little to nothing to do until the higher ups get off their asses and do their part so I can do mine.

Can you tell I'm a little moody today?